Sometimes they all suck.  Choosing which sucks more makes my head hurt
Bitter Bitch

Many updates have occurred in these reviews.  You may want to have a second look.

1. Bend It Like A Banana

This blog was reviewed by me before.  This is a request for a new review after many (?!?) tweaks and fixes.

Template:  MUCH better than before.  Nothing flashing or moving.  I like this.  This template, though yellow (my least favourite colour for a template) is really cute.  I like it very much.  The sidebar is also much more reasonable.

He didn’t quite get all of the advice we’ve given him and still uses funky font colours.  He’s also still extremely inconsitent with font sizes.  He hasn’t lost that annoying habit of titling his posts twice, once with a reasonable font and once with a huge, honking WTF font.  The huge purple Manglish (I think) sentence at the end of every post makes me want to slap the shit out of him.

Kudos for better template with decent sidebar.  Screw you for crimes against fonts, multi-colour atrocities, and purple manglish (I think).

This will never be a blog I want to read.  it’s just not my thing.  His content is his content.  I don’t care for it.

Charles, for the love of Blog, quit with the fucking double titles, huge fonts, multi-coloured fonts and shit.  Please.  I beg you.

I give it 1 for trying and 2 for listening to his Auntie Bitter Bitch.

2. Miz BoheMia’s Rhapsody

MY EYEEEEES.  MY EYEEEES!

What the fuckity fuck is up with that hideous fucking background?  Dear God woman!  Are you blind?  1600x1200 gets to see lots more background.  Please remember this when you opt for Fucked Up Background O’ Death.  I’m betting 1152x864 and 1280x1024 people are also now blinded for life.

Cute header but there are bare boobies which may not be work appropriate.  I find it highly appropriate.  But that’s just meUPDATE: missed the breast milk and cereal part.  Tacky and WTF?

Sidebar link colour is impossible to read.  Sidebar sucks in ways that nothing should ever be allowed to suck.  Vegetarian?  Cool.  STFU, pleezethanks.  8 million ‘link to her’ buttons.  STFU, pleezethanks.  More buttons than any sidebar should ever be subjected to.  STFU, pleezethanks.

Her inside pages open in new windows.  NO, just NO.  Outside pages can freely open in new windows so I don’t lose your blog, inside pages are, you know, still part of your blog.  Get it?  On second thought, losing your blog isn’t such a bad idea.

The content itself isn’t bad.  Sometimes it’s amusing, bitchy and witty.  Unfortunately, the content can’t win over the hideous background and Sidebar O’ Death.  I would never, ever go back to this blog.  Ever.  Really.

Enjoy joining the ranks of the popular Negative Smack™.

I give it negative for making my eyes bug out from the background so bad, I missed all the other crimes against Blog.

A big thanks to alert reader Ryan.  (Better him seeing this shit than me.)

3. PractiGal

Sidebar ok although blogroll is on the longer side and something went very wrong with the alignment of the web rings at the bottom.  Template is easy on the eyes, if a bit plain...thank God...I was afraid the previous reviewee’s background was forever burnt onto my retinas.

First post.  Thursday 13.  I have no idea why, but she has a fucking blogroll in the post.  I assume the entire fucking net’s worth of people who do that thing.  Dear Jesus.

Second post:  National Delurking Week.

Thank you and do come again.  Here’s some Negative Smacks™ for pissing me off.

I give it negative smacks for trying to force people to comment.

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